Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Kurt smells like Teen Spirit

Breakfast Club. End of story.

Hate teenagers all you want, but we invented you. We're the defining marker of society. When you think of every major period in time you think of teenagers. Teenage cavemen, teenage pioneers, teenage breakdancers, teenage soldiers in WWIII, teenage Jesus. Yeah... He partied hard.

We break the law... We drink underage, we ride bikes legitimately looking cool instead of Lance Armstrong wannabes, blunts look cooler in the mouths of teenagers versus high, geriatric radio hosts, we invented punk rock.
Ever notice how the last realistically heart touching movie you saw was Juno or something like that where people are in high school and fall consistently in and out of love? That's cause only teenagers know the meaning of true love. DUH!!!!
The best film noir I ever saw was completely teenagers. And film noir is the pinnacle of cinematic expression. But I'm sure you knew that.

About the face trouncing... Good luck with that. Teenagers have piercings and shit in their faces, if you try and face trounce us, whatever you try and trounce us with will most likely be getting trounced with retroactive motion. Not to mention 90% of teenagers have a better knowledge of physics cause it's fresher in their memory. So don't act up.

Superbad, Freaks and Geeks, Juice, Dazed and Confused, Transformers. Just for the record.