Thursday, February 26, 2009

Who's Your Man?

This might seem tasteless, but I'm making a point. Plus my palette is spoiled due to that massive piece of cheesecake I had for dessert.

You thought all was good in the world, that handsome young male singer/dancers existed that were kind and perfect and would take you pimpin' all over the world. Oh wait, that's Bobby Valentino... Nevermind...

But I bet you wish you could dance like me.

You were wrong! Chris Brown is a woman beater. He even bit his girlfriend for good measure. WITH HIS TEETH. Just cause she went all swimfan on him or something.

The point I'm making here is that you shouldn't be fantasizing about guys like Chris Brown when I'm here doing headspins to boogaloo right before your eyes. I have a black belt so I know the meaning of self restraint. You'd have to do some pretty nasty stuff to make me beat you up. Like unplug my Nintendo while I'm playing Megaman 2 or something.

So next time you're feeling a little lonely you should ring me up, I could even teach you self defence so if you should happen to accidently trip over the power cord, you'll be able to fight back.


The Illest Bent Handstyle said...

Cheesecake would never spoil your pallette, cheesecake only makes everything in life richer and better.
Too bad it makes you so fat AMIRIGHT? HAHAHHAHA

ess elsie. said...

"Just cause she went all swimfan on him or something."


Also, I have friends that have taken to saying things like "you better shut your mouth or I'll go Chris Brown on you" or "you're gonna get Rihanna'ed!"

jamesforlife said...

Ya, I've also heard people using these terms.. like CB'd, thats my favorite one LOL.