Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Missed Text and Inadequate Advice



Fans of the ordinary, Liars of the cause.
If spit wasn't a nutritional necessity during a Revolution a poor man would dispel some in the face of such obstacles. But today is a new day (don't think about it stupid face its obviously a new day) and well lubricated orifices, and I say orifices because some choose to speak with holes on the dorsal area of their body, are ready to stop tellin it like it ain't and start tellin it like it am.

Diving into a world of possibilities is no different than waking up in the morning. I guess the world is complex, here are a few more things I guess at; science, flirtation, jeopardy, normal human behavior and finally sexual prowess. Within all of my estimations I have found a few constants in a realm of infinite problems. These pillars can be counted as a qualitative addition to time and can be relied on to maintain the structural integrity of the universe. For instance, light is and will be forever magical and even with all of its quantitative quality the intrinsic value of light will always be joyful.

Oh so you made it to the third paragraph did you? Well, well done this is what I really wanted to talk about. I have a problem with taking a dump then turning around to check out the final product(s). The reason I brought this up is because I have lost two phones to this habit and these phones had important numbers on them. So if you want to be like me this is how you do it. Step 1, take dump. Step 2, turn around to look at dump, Step 3 is an alternate step and if it gets to Step 3 then continue on to Step 4 and 5. Step 3, if you notice foreign material ex. corn, rice grains, general vegetable roughage, etc.. then proceed the exam at a closer radius. Step 4, have phone drop out of sweater pocket (poorly designed) into toilet. Step 5, take time to consider flushing phone, getting phone or leaving the entire mess.

13 comments:

Kid Vincent said...

When my phone fell into my toilet filled with radioactive waste it turned into a super phone that helps me hear when people are in danger.
I ignored a call from my Uncle Ben once to talk to some honey and he died.
Now I know that with a dope phone comes great responsibility.

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